Friday, December 14, 2007

Interesting

Some thought-provoking questions....I've supplied the answers (my answers, anyway).

Can you cry under water?

(If you did, you wouldn't have to dry your eyes.)

How important does a person have to be before they are considered
assassinated instead of just murdered?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in" but it's only a "penny for your
thoughts"?
Where's that extra penny going to?

(It's going towards the price of gas.)

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried
in for eternity?

(I thought there were no clothes in heaven.)

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

What disease did cured ham actually have?

(I wonder who even thought of this question. Someone with way too much time on their hands...wait how can one have time on their hands, unless one is wearing a watch. I just answered my own question.)

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a
good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up like
every two hours?

(And why do we say, we slept like a log when logs don't sleep. Logs aren't even real.)

If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still called a hearing?

(HUH???? Speak up!!!)

Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars
to look at things on the ground?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
They're going to see you naked anyway.

Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural?

(This could go for the word pants also, there is only one and yet they are a pair.)

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible
crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a stupid song about him?

(So that we can sing stupid songs about people we don't care about.)

Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane ?

(And why is it called a 'carpool' lane? It has nothing to do with a pool.)

WHY DO YOU DRIVE ON A PARKWAY AND PARK ON A DRIVEWAY??

(Good question. I think it's so we will be confused.)

If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why
can't he fix a hole in a boat?

(Because then there wouldn't have been a show every single week for 3 years.)

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours?
They're both dogs!

If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that ACME crap, why didn't he
just buy dinner?

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from
vegetables,what is baby oil made from?

(Do we really want to know the answer to this one???)

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

Why did you just try singing the two songs above?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call
it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ASS?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you,
but when you take him for a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

peace,

paul

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