Sat. Dec. 31-movie minute

The "Produce" Section: Jim and I went to see The Producers starring Nathan Lane and Matthew Broderick. We were both unsure if we would like the film because neither one of us much cared for Rent. The Producers was a very pleasant surprise. I never saw the original or the Broadway play. The original starred Zero Mostel as Max Bialystock (played by Nathan Lane in the new version) and Gene Wilder starred as Leo Bloom (played by Matthew Broderick in the new version). Watching Broderick in the role I could see Gene Wilder playing the role as it's kind of a crazy/funny role. The film was really good; very laugh out loud funny in a number of places. Broderick and Lane played their roles on the stage as well as did two other characters in the film. Gary Beach who plays director Roger De Bris, a man who likes to dress up as a woman, is a stitch. He also ends up playing Hitler in the play within the movie. The other actor who played the same role on Broadway is Roger Bart. Bart is probably most familiar as the creepy George Williams on Desperate Housewives. From Bart's first scene to final scene he was absolutely hysterical. Bart plays Carmen Ghia, the common law assistant to Roger De Bris. Bart alone is worth seeing this film as he really hams it up in a good way. He's very very very funny in this role. Jim laughed out loud many times (always a good sign). It was the raucous, "this is very very funny" laugh that lets me know he thinks what he's watching is truly funny. Will Ferrell was also very good as playwright Franz Liebkind. The premise is as follows: Two men, Broderick as an accountant who wants to be a producer, and Lane a washed up producer, figure out that a flop on Broadway can net them a handsome profit. They decide to stage the most offensive and unlikely to be a hit play and it ends up winning rave reviews. Lane and especially Broderick are really good and Broderick is really underrated as a comic actor. I still have a crush on Lane, however, it looks like he's put on a few extra pounds. It's alright though because it was good for the character he plays; a sleazy producer. It may have been better on the stage but then I wouldn't know. With me, and I believe with Jim, it scores!!!!

paul

Many many thanks to my friend Chris who sent this. I'd pay to see THIS movie!

Here's a whole year's worth of strange and odd articles. Some of these I've posted in my blog but they are all worth reading. Yes, I've read them all and it just proves that there are some really weird people in the world. My personal favs the python in Florida that tried to eat the 6 foot alligator, the woman who superglued her ex's genitals to his abdomen and glued his butt cheeks together and topping them all: The Indiana kid who climbed into the stuffed toy vending machine. One of the machines with the crane that you have to control to grab a prize. It's all fun and games until you realize your kid is stuck in there. Enjoy!!!!!

My thanks to my spouse for sending me this.


http://www.rochesterinsider.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20051230/INSIDER04/912310404

My thanks to my friend Sherri who sent this to me a while ago.

EVER WONDER WHY.................

drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes and candy at the front?

people order double cheeseburgers, large fries, and a diet coke?

banks leave both doors open and then chain the pens to the counters?

we leave cars worth thousands of dollars in the driveway and put our useless junk in the garage?

we buy hot dogs in packages of ten and buns in packages of eight?

we use the word 'politics' to describe the process of governing our freedom? ('Poli' in Latin meaning 'many' and 'tics' meaning 'bloodsucking creatures')

drive-up ATM machines include Braille lettering?

the sun lightens our hair, but darkens our skin?

"abbreviated" is such a long word?

doctors call what they do "practice"?

lemon juice is made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid is made with real lemon juice?

the person who invests all your money called a broker?

the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

they don't make the whole plane out of the stuff they use to make the indestructible black box?

sheep don't shrink when it rains?

they are called 'apartments' when they are all stuck together?

they call the airport the "terminal" if flying is so safe?

And if con is the opposite of pro, do you ever wonder if Congress is the opposite of progress?

According to Billboard magazine the Top Album of the year (they have some formula based on sales and stuff) is The Massacre by 50 cent (or as I like to say fittycent). The top song of the year is Mariah Carey's We Belong Together. I personally don't want to belong to Mariah Carey and think the song is trite and overplayed but I've compiled my own list below. I won't call these things the best of the year just some of my top favorites of 2005. Enjoy!!!!


Favorite mainstream movie: Cinderella Man

Favorite indie movie: Tie between Walk On Water and Millions

Favorite CD: Death Cab For Cutie: Plans

Favorite soundtrack CD: Millions

Favorite new tv show drama: Invasion

Favorite new tv show comedy: My Name Is Earl

Favorite "old" tv show drama: 24

Favorite "old" tv show comedy: Arrested Development

Favorite song: JoDee Messina's "My Give A Damn's Busted"

Favorite Christian song: "Lifesong" by Casting Crowns

Favorite book: Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince by JK Rowling

Happy and Safe 2006

paul

My thanks to Lady Di for these jokes. I don't know if they are true but there are some people out there that make me wonder........


A fellow bought a new refrigerator. To get rid of the old one, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free to good home You want it, you take it".For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. Eventually he decided that people didn't-trust this deal because it looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: "Fridge for sale $50". The next day someone stole it.
This person votes.

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was North because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the North?" When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, (and has for sometime), she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that stuff"...She too votes!

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?" Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific" . .He ALSO votes!

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was moving". This one ALSO votes!

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car It's designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk. .My sister votes!

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount...He ALSO votes!

I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain rip out every time she turned her head?" I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned...My friend votes!

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your plane arrived yet?". . .SHE ALSO votes!

To those who understand ~ No explanation is necessaryFor those who don't understand ~ No explanation is possible

paul

A photo of a fish caught in Holmes Lake in Lincoln, Neb. The rainbow trout weighed in at about a pound and the bottom mouth did not appear to be functional. Creepy!!!!

Tropical storm Zeta has formed in the Atlantic; not Catherine Zeta, just tropical storm Zeta. I guess Mother Nature doesn't care that hurricane season ended a month ago. She's obviously making up her own schedule.

Bye Bye Bun: It's been featured on The Late Show with David Letterman, world news shows, mentioned on Mad About You and The Nanny and now it's gone. The cinnamon bun that bore the likeness of Mother Teresa was stolen from the shop it had been kept in. The owner found it missing on Christmas morning; the bun had been preserved with shellac. The jar of money that was next to the bun was still there. Ok, either someone was really hungry or they wanted to feed it to the birds or just destroy it. The bun first gained attention back in 1996 and of course these days Jesus, Mother Teresa, God, Virgin Mary and other religious figures are seen in everything from toast to trees.

paul

Did you hear the one about....? In Rob Reiner's new movie, Rumor Has It, Jennifer Aniston, a half baked actress if ever I saw one, decides to cheat on gorgeous fiancee Mark Ruffalo and then beg his forgiveness because she didn't know who she was. Give me a break!!!! If Mark Ruffalo is your fiancee you don't cheat on him with anyone; even if it is Kevin Costner. The premise is this: Aniston plays Sarah Huttinger whose family is supposedly the basis of the book and film The Graduate. There's Mrs. Robinson, Shirley MacLaine; Benjamin Braddock, Kevin Costner playing another BB (Beau Burroughs) and Aniston who may or may not be the offspring of her mother's affair with Beau. If you've seen the movie The Graduate then this will be mildly entertaining; if you haven't then it will be just mild. The film has some funny moments (2 or 3) and a few bright spots. MacLaine is wonderful and hits another one out of the park. Ruffalo is really an underrated actor but Aniston is what brings this film down. If another actress had been cast the film could have been better but there's still the fact that Ruffalo is the fiancee, no cheating.

paul

A little perspective today as the one year anniversary of the devastating tsunami is marked. One year ago today Indonesia was hit with a major tsunami and people are still rebuilding and struggling socially and economically. Let's keep in mind before we complain about the weather or all of the work we have that some people lost entire families, lost everything they own.

peace,

paul

weekly post-December 24, 2005

I didn't realize I was so behind in posting my weekly emails

Here it is another Christmas Eve. I decided to be really annoying and type this in red and green. I was going to do all red but then thought, no, I'll go the extra festive step. Jim thinks that red is an "angry" color but I think it's just misunderstood. Red doesn't have to signify anger all the time, it can mean fun and liveliness and festivity.

We had a wonderful dinner with two friends from Binghamton last night. They are both so much fun and so easy to be with. We can say anything without being judged; a refreshing thing considering our world today. Next week we'll have dinner with a good friend from Elmira, someone I don't get the chance to see as often as I'd like.

I feel a bit deflated this morning; a feeling that started yesterday afternoon. I figured out why: The film that I had been looking forward to seeing for so long has been seen and I was disappointed. It's really weird but I was really really really looking forward to seeing Memoirs Of A Geisha; I don't remember the last time seeing a film held so much anticipation and excitement for me, if there ever was a time. I finally saw it yesterday and I ended feeling disappointed, as I knew I would on some level. The book was incredibly good and the movie just did not capture the true feeling of the book. I'm glad I saw it but now it's like this "huge" event is over. Now I've just nothing more to look forward to (actually, I was just kidding with that last line).

Today Jim will do some baking and I'll be off to see Munich (it's being called a controversial film but really, if you think about it, the whole event is controversial. The film is only controversial in the fact that the event is being replayed and "packaged" as a movie for everyone to see.) This evening we'll have Christmas Eve service and then tomorrow so of the deacon trainees will hold a Christmas Day service. I like the idea of having a Christmas Eve service and, since Christmas is on a Sunday, not having a Sunday service. Jim and I will not attend the service being held tomorrow but some people felt it was important to have something that day and some of the deacon trainees stepped up and took charge.

weekly post-December 17,2005

Another week has ended and the weekend has begun. I actually finished my Christmas shopping yesterday. I avoided the crowds this year as I only shopped in the early morning and I did not shop on Black Friday. Most of the stuff I bought this year I purchased online (how very convenient and addictive) and I was surprised at how creative I was in terms of what to get Jim. He's very difficult to shop for. He's one of those people who never say what they want and when they are asked they always hem and haw. Or when he is asked what he wants, always says, "I have everything I want."

Last evening we had dinner with a couple from church. One of the women is best friends with the mother of Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Hoffman, a native of Fairport, NY, is currently portraying Truman Capote in the aptly titled film Capote. It truly is a small world.

Today we have a meeting of the artsy fartsy film group; a group that meets once a month to see a non-mainstream movie. I'm very disappointed that we aren't seeing Brokeback Mountain but that's only because it's not yet playing in Rochester. Sadly, Rochester is not one of the "special select cities" that movies open up in before going wide. It really is Rottenchester. I shouldn't say that because Rochester does have a lot of good qualities. We could live in worse places.

Stranger than fiction (I can't make this stuff up): Have you got a problem with your plumbing? Check your basement-for people. One woman in Spokane, WA, had a problem with her plumbing and called the water department. The water department found the basement door barricaded and eventually realized there was someone behind the door, that's when police were called. A 36-year old naked man was found in the basement, no clothes were found and he was taken into custody by the police. The pipe, it was discovered, had been broken and then repaired, obviously not very well. Kind of gives Desperate Housewives's storyline of the man in the basement a run for its money. Creepy!!!

weekly post-December 10, 2005

We had a pretty quiet week this past week. We like quiet weeks. My spouse canceled the Wednesday night church service after only a few weeks because of lack of attendance. I'm glad because it's one less day of the week that he has to be out late. He finishes us his course Varieties Of Gay & Lesbian Religious Experience (talk about a mouthful) this week and I always enjoy hearing about his assignments and what other people in the course post about them. Maybe I'm biased but I sometimes think his brain must be 3x bigger than everyone else's. Today we'll have dinner at the home of one of our church members with a few other couples and for the next three Friday nights we're booked for dinner with other friends. Talk about a social calendar. Are YOU doing something fun this weekend?

Stranger than fiction (I can't make this stuff up): There was a study that was presented in Chicago last week that was very alarming and sad. Women are not getting the full effect of vaccines and painkillers. Doctors in Ireland gave 25 women shots and each shot included an air bubble. The bubble and meds only reached the muscle in the buttock in two of the women. To be effective, the medicine must be injected into the muscle. The medicine and bubble in the other twenty-three women didn't reach the muscle and the women were at risk for infection. Standard size shots are no longer cutting it apparently. The study focused on women but I'm sure the same could be true of men. Rounder rumps are preventing the medicines from working. The solution: Longer needles!!!! So next time the doctor says it will hurt him/her more than it will hurt you, it's a lie!!!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

Murder in Munich

Steven Spielberg's new film Munich is a thought provoking, intelligent and polished political thriller that should not be missed. I went into this movie thinking that I wasn't going to like it at all. It's not the kind of movie that I usually enjoy, especially considering the subject matter; gruesome and very violent. Munich tells the story of what happens after the group Black September killed 11 Israeli athletes at the 1972 Olympic games. Based on George Jonas's book Vengeance, the movie was filmed in such places as Hungary, Paris, Budapest, and New York City. A group of hitmen are hired by Prime Minister Golda Meir and a list of Palestinian names are given to them; they are to knock off each man in response to the killings at the games. Leading the group of men is Avner, played by The Incredible Hulk star Eric Bana. The film follows the group as they go from killing to killing and we watch as each is affected by their task. One of the film's prevailing themes is that of having a home to go to. One ironic thing about the movie is that as the five guys go through their list of names, killing for their home of Israel, they lose a bit of themselves with each death and eventually lose their original home. Bana is very well cast as Avner and the movie features plenty of scenes set up to make one think. Spielberg has done an incredible job with a film of heavy subject matter. It's at least as violent, if not more so, as his film Saving Private Ryan and there are several scenes of very graphic violence. Spielberg has been criticized as sympathizing with the Jews and making the Palestinians out to be the true bad guys; I don't totally agree with that. I can see where they would get that, however, the guy who was the model for Avner was actually interviewed by Spielberg so are those criticized scenes artistic license or actual events? Only the real guy knows for sure. Several Israeli officials have acknowledged that the hit squad actually existed and though the film was inspired by actual events, there's no doubt that a number of things in the film actually happened. The film has a couple of scenes which threaten to become too preachy but there are some excellent scenes in which one can see why there is not peace in the world. There's an especially tense scene in which one hit squad comes into the safehouse of another hit squad and as the two teams face off with each other it's evident why the cycle of violence continues and continues. One minor character says that free will will be the downfall of society and she couldn't be more right. I totally enjoyed the artistic value and storytelling of this film and watching the transformation of the five hunting Israeli hitmen, especially as they soon become the hunted, is a visceral process. Even Avner, who claims that it's just a job and he gets up each day to kill and then go to bed, is haunted by his actions, which he claims have no affect on him. One scene which shows his paranoia getting the best of him is suspenseful and sad at the same time. At the end when Avner realizes the true consequences of what he'd done, how his life really will never be the same, it's not hard to ask the question, "Was it all worth it?" This is the film to beat, in my humble opinion, for the Best Picture race; assuming of course that it's even nominated.

Whine of the week: Just because it's Christmas doesn't mean I can't find something to whine about. Why can't people put their shopping carts in the basket caddies found in the parking lots of grocery stores? It's really not that difficult to walk a few extra steps and put the cart out of the way. It's really annoying when people leave carts in parking spaces or if I come out of the store and there's a cart by my car thanks to the person who was parked next to me and just left. Are people that lazy? I guess the obvious answer is yes. They didn't make those basket caddies for the hell of it. And if it's really windy then there's the worry that the wind will push the basket into the car; believe me the wind can get pretty fierce.

See Jane and Dick Run: The "new" movie Fun With Dick And Jane stars Jim Carrey and Tea Leoni as Dick and Jane Harper. They both either quit or lost their jobs and then suffer the humiliation of going broke and losing everything. They go from living the upper middle class dream to almost living on the street. Then Dick gets the idea to "take back" what's rightfully theirs and decides to start up on a robbing spree; Jane joins him and the two start their life of crime. The film is a remake of the 1976 movie with George Segal and Jane Fonda. What worked in the 70's era does not work in the 2000's era. In the original there was more desperation; times were different and the Harpers stumbled into their life of crime. The couple end up at a loan center when the place is held up and Jane is taken hostage...for about two minutes. She ends up not being taken away with the robbers but does end up with their money. Segal and Fonda are a likable couple and at the end, during their final heist, I found myself rooting for them and hoping they get away with it. I won't tell you what happens but I will say that Carrey and Leoni, while not totally unlikable, are no Segal and Fonda. There's too much of Carrey's shtick in the movie and it's too implausible. And with the exception of only a couple of scenes, it's not funny either. There is a nice shot of the couple dressed as a very famous singing duo, however, there is no dialogue or interaction with other characters. How they spend the money near the end is a nice touch considering today's cutthroat world of business. If you are in the mood for a non-funny mindless comedy, this one's for you.

paul

Book Club

No, NO, Narnia: Seeing the movie The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, And The Wardrobe has sparked my interest in the other Narnia books. So I've started reading the other ones. Interestingly enough before I started reading the subsequent books, I mentioned to someone at work that there are talking beavers in the first Narnia book; this guy I mentioned it to likes beavers. Someone else overheard me and said that The Lion, The Witch, And The Wardrobe was not the first book and he had just read all seven. He said that The Magician's Nephew was the first book. I knew that I had read somewhere it was the first book but I just listened and nodded. Then I got home and did some research; technically it IS the first book. It was written in 1950 whereas The Magician's Nephew was written in 1955. Jim heard a piece on NPR and it talked about how C.S. Lewis was friends with J.R.R. Tolkien and Tolkien encouraged Lewis to create backstory on the world of Narnia so The Magician's Nephew details how Narnia came to be. So in that respect it could be considered the first book. Reading the creation of Narnia is very similar to the passages in Genesis which talk about how the world was created; coincidence or not? I think not. Anyway, I guess in a way we were both right. The order of the books, as they were written is as follows: The Chronicles Of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, And The Wardrobe, Prince Caspian, The Voyage Of The Dawn Treader, The Silver Chair, The Horse And His Boy, The Magician's Nephew, and The Last Battle.

Happy reading,

paul

My, My Memoirs: First of all, I just want to say, I'm glad Memoirs Of A Geisha was directed by a gay man. Rob Marshall, the director of Chicago, is gay and has done a remarkable job of bringing the acclaimed novel to the big screen. Secondly, I was disappointed by the film, but not for the reason you may think. I read the book back in October and finished rereading it at the beginning of this week so it would be fresh in my mind. Every tweak and change that deviated from the book I noticed immediately. The film's biggest flaw is that it didn't capture the excitement, intensity and desperation of geisha life that the book so vividly evoked. Most of the movie is faithful to the book, however, one of the characters was softened, and scene in which the villainess goes over the deep end was changed from the book. It's written one way in the book and she does something entirely different in the movie to get thrown out of the geisha house. The three actresses, Michelle Yeoh, Ziyi Zhang, and Gong Li are all wonderful despite the fact that they are all Chinese. It's no different than a British actor playing an American or an American playing a German or British character. The end scene in which Sayuri, as played by Ziyi Zhang, finally gets her heart's desire, didn't give me chills the way it did in the book both times I read it. That's not the fault of the director, it's the fact that the book is so incredibly written that it is incomparable. I think that for anyone who liked the book they will enjoy the movie but expect to be disappointed. I knew I would feel some sort of letdown but it's not so great that I would say the movie was awful; it wasn't, it was beautiful and well directed and, I think, a lock for an Academy Award nom for Best Director.

paul

Happy Winter Solstice and Merry Christmas. I don't want to go around worrying about being politically correct. If I know someone is Jewish or doesn't celebrate the holidays then I won't say Merry Christmas but I won't censor myself any other time. Life is too short for that; just say what's in your heart and move on. And none of this Happy Chrismahanukwanzakah or Merry Chrismukkah. That's just ridiculous.

Who says there's nothing good on the radio? I'm really enjoying Ever The Same by Rob Thomas and Animals by Nickelback

Hello, you've got mail and an STD: Yes, now you can email that person you had anonymous sex with and tell them that you infected them. It's a program that was recently launched in Los Angeles County, you can go to www.inspotla.org San Francisco launched a similar site last year and generates about 500 e-cards a month. It's aimed at gay men but anyone can use it. One e-card reads, "It's not what you brought to the party, it's what you left with. I left with an STD. You might have one too. Get checked out soon." Oh, and by the way, have a great day (ok, I added that last part). What happened to having the nerve to tell someone news like that to their face? Now we've become so impersonal we have to email someone to tell them they have AIDS. I can understand someone being scared to tell someone else, "Oh, hey, I gave you gonorrhea," but really have a backbone. If you're going to be stupid enough to have unprotected sex, then you should have to go through the mortification of telling someone you gave them a little somthin, somthin, extra.

Pretty Penguins: They were so adorable in the movie March Of The Penguins. Toga, a 3 month old penguin, was stolen from Amazon World last Saturday. Amazon World is a zoo on the Isle of Wright in Southern England. The penguin was still in the process of being fed by his parents and could die of malnutrition and at this point could be severly dehydrated. With no sign of forced entry, someone apparently climbed over the wall of the compound the penguin was being kept in and absconded with the gender neutral Toga. A sex had not yet been determined but they are usually referred to as males. One other thing, Toga will bite if he becomes frightened and won't eat from a human hand. No word yet on if Mr & Mrs Tux (tuxedo) will appear on CNN.

Enjoy your day,

paul

I had an incident happen to me yesterday that really irritated me but not for too long. I firmly and strongly believe that if one is going to work in a video store that they have SOME knowledge of movies. For example, if a remake is coming out, they should know that it is a remake. So, without further ado, a written copy of an actual conversation I had with an employee of Hollywood Video on December 19, 2005 around 8pm EST.

(Phone rings and then picks up): Hello, Hollywood Video, this is Sara.

Me: Yes, I'm wondering if you have the movie Fun With Dick And Jane.

Sara: That hasn't come out yet.

Me: Oh! I was looking for the original one.

Sara: That hasn't been released on DVD or VHS yet. It won't be for a long time.

Me: Oh, I wanted the original Fun With Dick And Jane with George Segal and Jane Fonda from 1976.

Sara: Let me check. (silence while Sara checks. Comes back to phone). We don't have that title. (Her tone is clearly that of, "I told you it hasn't come out yet.")

Me: Ok, thank you for checking.

At this point I called Blockbuster and spoke with Jonathan. I gave Jonathan all of the info for the movie, year, stars, etc. and they had it. I felt like taking it and driving to Hollywood Video and waving it in Sara's face and saying, "It is out! It is out!"

Enjoy your day,

paul