Where no one knows your name: Hurricane Andrew roared through Florida in August of 1992 and while many of the repairs have probably since been completed (and then some), one woman is just now getting her power back on. An elderly woman has gone 15 years with no hot water, no heat in the winter and no ac in the summer. Thanks to a shoddy contractor she had to stop the repairs when her insurance ran out. Then she couldn't get her house up to code so the electricity was never turned back on. This lady must have been really, really isolated in order for no one to have known she was living like this. How is that even possible? For 15 friggin' years????? Neighbors apparently never noticed (were they miles away from her?) and inspectors never noticed that she was below code to get her power back on. A tip finally got the Miami-Dade mayor and an electrical contractor involved. After just a few hours, she was back up and running in the 21st century.
Up, up, and away: How's this for a medical marvel? A 15-year-old girl has been stricken with intractable involuntary spasms of the diaphragm. Or, hiccups, to make things simpler. The 15-year-old has had them since Jan. 23 and while more than 100 different diseases can cause hiccups. Jennifer Mee hiccups up to 50 times a minute and keeps going and going and going. In Mee's case, the hiccups only stop when she's sleeping. The longest record (if you consider it a record) of hiccups is 69 years and 5 months. Charles Osborne, of Iowa, married twice, had eight children and still lived to his 90's. All the while Osborne hiccupped every 11 1/2 seconds. Now that's incredible. But how do you live a life with hiccups in the way? I get crazy when I hiccup for more than five minutes, I cannot imagine hiccupping for a month or 69 years. I'd have to put myself out of my misery.
Midseason Replacement: Can someone please get Florida Judge Larry Seidlin his own show? Now? This guy is a piece of work. He's presiding over the burial case for Anna Nicole Smith and, if he had his way, he'd preside over the paternity test too. With his Bronx accent he is the ringmaster of this circus. It was the history of the world according to Larry in court yesterday as his Honor waxed wise on chopping trees, wind, and his tennis attire among other topics. His extraneous remarks, repeated commands for people to sit down, and unnecessary questioning and lawyering are turning what could have been a one day event into a weeklong freak show that could soon be going into week two. It's said the case will wrap up on Friday but with Seidlin in charge we could be here for weeks. No word on when the cliffhanger for this reality show, um, case will be aired.
Bevy of Boys: And one final thought: Mitt Romney, president wannabe and voter of an amendment to ban same sex marriage, has five sons. Is not one of these boys gay? Not even one? Well, it's a sure bet that if there IS one who is gay, he'll be stuck in the closet for the rest of his life.