A little Monday morning humor:

DUI - West Virginian StyleRecently a routine police patrol parked outside a bar in Ripley,West Virginia. After last call the officer noticed a man leaving the bar apparently so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the parking lot for a few minutes with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five different vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into. He sat there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.Finally he started the car, switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine, dry summer night) -- flicked the blinkers on, then off a couple of times, honked the horn and then switched on the lights. The policeman's attention was totally focused on the man and his bizarre actions. The bar patron moved the vehicle forward a few inches,reversed a little and then remained still for a few more minutes as several more of the other patron's vehicles left. At last, the parking lot empty, he pulled out of the parking lot and started to slowly drive down the road. The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, and promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyzer test. To his amazement the breathalyzer indicated no evidence of the man having consumed any alcohol! Dumbfounded, the officer said, "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to the police station. This breathalyzer equipment must be broken." "I doubt it," said the truly proud West Virginian. "Tonight I'm the designated decoy."